Resistance?

The time loomed close. At first light just before dawn, the group was to set off into unknown territory. Yesterday was a long day. Walking across a harsh and rugged landscape with minimal supplies and uncertain access to water. Their bed had been scraped out among rocks and sticks. Sleep had been elusive, caught in short bursts of an hour or two and punctuated by the need to stoke the fire for warmth or ease the pressure of sleeping on the ground.

In the pre dawn stillness, I heard someone throw up. Not a good start to the day! As the team medic, it was my job to investigate and assess. I was surprised by what I found. The young man who was ill was by far the fittest member of the group. Well trained, confident and competent. He'd been talking about taking this trip for over 2 years, and was planning to take on an even greater challenge immediately afterwards. As we talked about what was going on for him, it turned out that he wasn't ill as such. But he was stressed. 

His stress had him literally tied in knots, bunched and spasming muscle, a headache and waves of nausea. Debilitated by fear and anxiety. Despite our collective efforts, he was unable to stake it off, and ended up pulling out of the exercise.

His reaction was at the extreme end of a continuum of stress - the other end being so unstressed that we are bored. Somewhere in the middle is peak performance where we are stressed enough to be motivated, but not so much that we are overwhelmed (If you want to know more about that, check out the Yerkes Dobson Curve). You may well have experienced some form of being overwhelmed during your life. In that state, it's very difficult to access your ability and rationale. Even simple decisions can seem impossible. Operating at that level takes an enormous amount of energy and is not sustainable.

When I'm speaking to people who are managing change programs, they often talk about resistance. Resistance sometimes shows up in spite of what people are saying. A person might have agreed to the change, and have even been enthusiastic about it, only to appear resistant later on. The typical response to resistance is to shove harder. More force rarely works and is usually matched with even greater resistance. 

Our pre dawn bloke was stressed and torn between a part of himself that really wanted to take on the challenge, and another that was unable to face it in that moment. He was concerned about appearing out of control, and incompetent in front of peers and mentors. This is often at the heart of resistance, and often is more to do with hard wired survival instinct than ego. For the vast majority of human history, we have lived in small tribes, or communities, reliant on each other's skill and competence for our very existence. in this context, incompetence was literally life threatening. When people are called upon to adopt something new, there's an inevitable period of uncertainly often accompanied by the need to learn new ways of doing. People will retreat to the familiar, especially if they are nearing their personal capacity of stress. It's not a conscious choice - they may not even be aware that they are doing it.

Rather than shoving harder, work on creating environments where the "new" can be engaged safely and playfully. Have explicit conversations about the unspoken expectations that create the resistance. - More on that next week. 

Healthy Change

Change is a complex process. Mostly, that is because there are people involved. The mechanics of change are usually fairly straight forward. As long as you know what needs to change, why it needs to change, and how you will change it, the rest should go well. Unfortunately, change is rarely that smooth. We run into resistance, confusion, lack of skill, fatigue  and sometimes downright sabotage. We run into issues when we treat change as a purely mechanical process.

Often leaders articulate the mechanics of a coming change very well, and are then surprised when people are not immediately on board. People are actually quite good at change. It's one of the things that has driven our technical and social evolution as a species. We are hard wired to find better and easier ways to do things, and to get more with less. But our inherent ability to change only kicks in when we have a sense of control over it, and when it has a positive meaning for us. Many organisational changes push us into short term situations of less competence and control. Often it significantly increases workloads and stress before the positive results are felt. When change feels threatening or out of control it's much more likely that people will not deal with it well. 

It's not enough to just articulate the mechanics. Leaders need to find ways to connect the change to people in ways that matter to them. Recognising and supporting people in the resulting stress are also important elements to success.

Tasha Broomhall at Blooming Minds gives some great tips in her latest ezine about managing change well. There's plenty of other good stuff in there for creating, maintaining and promoting mentally healthy workplaces. Check out the ezine here or click on the image.

Next week we'll get into some of the hidden aspects of change processes.

Who's involved?

The group sat in the shade and discussed their options. The campsite wasn't great. There was very little in the way of soft sand. In survival mode - literally sleeping on the ground -no soft sand means a hard nights sleep. The problem was it was also getting dark, and the group was walking in a gorge. Walking after dark was not a safe option. The group had almost decided to sleep here for the night. The trouble was not everyone had agreed. 

The group dispersed. Some people got busy collecting wood and water. Others began setting up a place to sleep. Two people were convinced that a better option existed just down the river. They decided to go check it out, recruiting another person on the way. They found a spot they preferred. Two people stayed there, replicating the effort of others upstream. The last came back to get the rest of the group. The trouble was no one else wanted to move. Not only had they not been involved in the revised decision, but they had also invested significant time and effort preparing this spot.

Eventually, the whole group got back together at the original spot. There were lots of disgruntled people, who remained dissatisfied for several days.

Over the past few weeks we have been looking at ineffective loops of behaviour. There are two here.

1. The majority of the group flew into action too quickly. They thought the decision had been made, but others were not convinced. Spending a few more minutes coming to a firm decision would have stopped the problem before it began.
2. The others made the subsequent decision without everyone present, and failed to communicate what they were doing and why. If they had gathered the group together for the discussion, or been more assertive in the original decision making process, they too could have headed it off at the pass.

Get clear before taking action. Involve all the key players.

Back Tracking

Once a survival group has decided to move, and which way to go - they get moving. In situations where there is a track to be followed, this is easy, but in wild bush it's a constant negotiation between the group and the terrain. As in life, there is seldom a well paved and clear path ahead. Making your way requires effort, thought and consistent forward movement.

The most effective groups will use game trails where they can, because the animals have cleared the way a bit. Walking on a game trail is always easier than pushing through bush. In the absence of a game trail, effective groups will negotiate obstacles by looking well ahead and choosing the route that takes them as close to the right direction as possible. A straight line in the bush just doesn't happen and sometimes the best way is longer but easier. 

The very best of groups will make every step a step forward if they possibly can. They'll go sideways if they have to, but they'll avoid going backwards at all costs. Having to turn back is energy sapping and mentally tough. You quickly feel like you are going nowhere.

Less effective patterns see groups charging ahead, getting stuck and having to back track, sometimes over the exact the same ground they have just walked. Sometimes it's unavoidable, but that's rare. Usually back tracking is caused by these factors which have strong parallels in business:

• Not having a clear enough plan.
• Taking action too quickly resulting in confusion.
• Spreading the group and resources out so far that they lose touch with each other and have to invest time getting back together.
• Not looking far enough ahead to anticipate potential issues.
• Taking short term easy options, that reduce or eliminate options further along. (one group walked down a wide sandy river bed, rather than cross a 50 metre mess of tangled trees at a river bend. 500 metres on they were stuck between a gorge wall and a 300 metre tangle of the same kinds of trees - it was back track or fight through.
• Wanting to confirm in great detail exactly where they are, rather than just heading for the next obvious check point.
• Not being proactive with resources - filling water bottles whenever it is possible, takes a little time, but avoids having to backtrack for water. 
• Leaving critical gear behind.

Sometimes it is worth deliberately backtracking. It's useful when you want to learn more about something you have passed along the way, or want to avoid making a similar mistake in the future. Otherwise the most effective pattern is to keep moving forward.

Decisions, decisions.

My last blog post stirred up a few questions from readers. People wanted to know what specific loops of behaviour were more or less effective. Over the next few weeks I'll unfold some of the more common ones.

The group sat around their morning camp fire. Debate raged back and forth about which way was the best way to go. They were partway through a 200km survival walk. Fatigue and hunger were beginning to play a part. Over the past days, the group had worked out that wasting effort took a toll on their energy and motivation. This morning's debate was about the most efficient route to take to their next check point. They had two clear options and opinion was divided about which was best.

It's a classic ineffective decision making loop. Just when a decision seemed to be made, the alternative was re opened for exploration. The decision making process dragged on and on. Neither party had enough information to mount a definitive case. By the time the group had settled on a decision, the day was heating up. They ended up walking through the heat, taxing their energy even further. The discussion had used up the cool of the day - the ideal time for action.

By the end of the walk, the group was operating as two fractured sub groups. They were making decisions by default, and sometimes taking action without even being clear about what they were doing, or why. The more decisions they made, the less decisive they became. People began second guessing themselves, and some pulled back from the process entirely.

They definitely did it tougher than they needed to.

By contrast groups that have effective decision making loops show these attributes.

• Explicit discussions about how they will make decisions, and resolve differing perspectives. They revisit these discussions often to ensure their process is working.
• Clear priorities. For example, taking action while it was cool always beat discussion at that time of day.
• Listening, openness and curiosity. They had ways to hear the quieter participants. Rather than just arguing they were keen to know what others were thinking and why.
• Deciding in advance. If the plan was to walk at first light, all decisions were made the night before, enabling action as soon as there was enough light.
• Reviewing decisions on the fly. In any situation, as you move forward, you get more information. Some of that sheds new light on your decisions, and may even mean they have to be changed. Rather that regretting the old decision, they simply made a new one and moved on.
• Group commitment. This is perhaps most important of all. Once decisions were made, the whole group committed to executing it. Whether they ultimately agree or not, effective groups take action together.

What can survival situations and scenarios teach us?

Many people are fascinated by survival and the two most common questions I get asked are:

"How did you get into teaching survival?" closely followed by, "Well that’s interesting Mike, but what’s it got to do with the real challenges and issues I face in my everyday life?"

Lets face it, it’s unlikely that most of us will face a genuine survival situation, where actual life of limb are at threat anytime soon. 

Over the years I’ve observed myself and many others in survival scenarios, and actual, life threatening situations. They are a great observation platform for human behaviour.

A survival situation is cleaner, clearer and less complex than the lives we typically live. There are straight, uncluttered lines between what people do, and the results of their actions. And, the feedback loops are rapid and aggressive. It’s possible to observe the outcome of a particular way of thinking or acting a short time after it has been used. Sometimes you get to see whether what you did was effective or ineffective in a matter of minutes or hours. At most it will be a few days. 

This combination of simplicity and rapid feedback make it possible to directly observe your habitual patterns of behaviour. How the survivalist makes decisions, leads, resolves conflict, deals with uncertainty, handles changes to plan, works under pressure, builds rapport, deals with disappointment, manages expectations, and their other patterns of behaviour are thrown into sharp relief against the backdrop of rapid feedback. Some patterns are more effective than others. Some people have a great toolbox of effective patterns. They handle uncertainty and difficulty with seeming ease. Others have patterns that make it more likely that things won’t go well for them, or the people around them.

Over the years I have seen the same patterns of behaviour I observe in the field show up in workplaces. They are present all the time, and get magnified when people are under pressure. In contrast to survival, work situations are much more complex. The feedback loops can be slow and indirect. At work, and in our relationships, it may be weeks, years, or even decades before we recognise the results of particular patterns. Even then, they may be so clouded in the complexity of projects, the patterns of other people, and the passage of time, that we may never gaze directly and clearly at the link between our patterns and our results.

Survival situations have much to teach us about the hard wired, ancient survival mechanisms we all have. They give great insights into the advantages and disadvantages of this incredible entity called a human being.

Having straddled the worlds of survival and organisational change for 20 years, I'm interested in giving people a bit of a user manual, helping them get the best out of themselves and the people around them when the pressure is on and the chips are down. 

What's the situation?

There's three types of situation we can be in.

1. A survival situation - If it is a physical situation life or limb will be at risk. In relationships or business the impact might be measured in loss of business, finances, or relationship breakdown. Survival situations are characterised by immanent and often dynamic threats which need to be dealt with decisively and quickly.
2. Just living - Things are neither extremely good, or extremely risky. These are great times for considered, proactive change or a deliberate, intentional rest.
3. A thriving situation - Life (or business) is going very well. Opportunities abound. Many aspects of the environment are aligning to create positive alliances, growth and possibilities. Make hay while the sun shines.

If we know what situation we are facing, we can intentionally and deliberately respond to it. It's amazing how often people think or react as if they are in a different situation to the one they are actually in. Sometimes people think, feel and act as if they are in a survival situation when they are not. It adds stress, they miss opportunities, and potentially they create a survival situation where there wasn't one.

The reverse can also be true, that we are in a survival situation, but think feel and act as if we are not. Very risky!

One of the clearest examples I see of this is on the road, but it happens in business and relationships as well.

 Every day I see a driver pick up their phone to check or send a message. It’s a clearly established fact that the instant you do so you massively increase the chances of crashing your car. 

Recent research by Professor Dingus in Virginia quantified this. He says, “Taking your eyes off the road to dial a cell phone or look up an address and send a text increases the risk of crashing by 600 to 2,300 per cent.”

If people were genuinely aware of this risk, they would never pick up the phone on the road. It is a genuine, life-at-risk survival situation. To be able to do that, there’s got to be a lack of acknowledgement of the real state. Either a sense that ‘I’m so bloody good at driving, this risk doesn’t apply to me” or “The traffic is cruisey, I’ve got heaps of space and time”.

There’s only three possible outcomes. 

1. A near miss. - This is the best possible outcome. It might shake the driver out of their complacent denial.
2. A sudden, violent reminder that Phone + Driving = Accident - This is at the very least destructive, always traumatic and in the worst case scenario, fatal. Definitely a bad outcome.
3. The driver gets away with it, reinforcing their delusion. - This actually significantly increases the future potential for 1 or 2 to occur. The fact the driver got away with it increases their sense that they are not in a survival situation, making it more likely that they will txt again, perhaps in increasingly busy traffic conditions, and for longer periods of time. 

All survival states are like this. The risk may not be directly to life or limb. It might be measured in financial or relationship terms, but ultimately lack of decisive and timely action will inevitably lead to a confrontation with the risk.

How do you determine what situation you are facing?

Effective Expectations

Expectations are powerful. They are uniquely human. As I work with individuals and businesses engaged in change, I often hear people say “Change is hard” or “people are not good at change”. I reckon this is a recent and not particularly useful myth. Humans have always been great at change. It’s the main reason we have achieved so much as a species. Stop for a moment and consider the incredible advances in every area of human endeavour. What we are capable of verges on miraculous sometimes. If we were not good at change we would still be living in caves. 

From the dawn of humanity we have been driven by 3 things that mean we are constantly looking to improve and evolve. We want to make things easier. We want to achieve more with less. We want to make things better. Da Vinci's inventions are great examples. He could see possibilities long before the technology existed to bring them to life.

“The reasonable man adapts himself to the conditions that surround him. The unreasonable man adapts surrounding conditions to himself. All progress therefore depends on the unreasonable man”

— George Bernard Shaw

We create an (often unreasonable) expectation that things can be better than their current state, and then we use those expectations to bend reality to meet us. For expectations to bend reality, they have to be crystal clear.

Action: Invest some regular time in clarifying your expectations. If others are involved communicate your expectations clearly to them. Allow time for exploration. Don’t expect people to automatically understand your expectations. 

That’s the powerful up-side to expectations. The down side comes when we hold them too tightly. Expectations cause us problems when:

• Reality is sending a clear message that what we expect is not currently possible.
• We persist with an unrealistic expectation.
• We hold them too tightly, causing blindspots, frustration, judgemental attitudes, defensiveness, conflict and anxiety.

Expectations held too tightly are the root cause of death in every survival situation. Nobody leaves town for a trip expecting to die. They expect to arrive at their destination. When they become lost or stranded, they still do not expect to die - they leave the vehicle expecting to walk to help. It is neither the expectation, nor the circumstance that is at fault; it is the fact that the expectation becomes immovable in the face of evidence that suggest a different tack.

Pursuing an expectation when reality dictates a change is a short road to frustration at best, and heavy losses at worst. These three elements are all present in Shackleton's expedition.

Action: Take regular opportunities for feedback about your expectations from the environment, circumstances your face, yourself and the people around you. Be prepared to modify or discard expectations if they are not serving you.

Expectations - Friction, Tension, and Conflict

Expectations and assumptions are the root cause of most tension, friction and conflict in all areas of human relationship. Both at work and at home. Part of the challenge of human performance and effectiveness is to articulate expectations and arrive at a shared understanding of what is important. It's a collective and individual process.

Even when we choose to have explicit conversations about expectations, the territory can be muddy. We frequently use language that in itself is laden with expectations and underlying assumptions. Words like 'respect', 'integrity' and 'accountability' usually draw easy agreement. There are few of us who would argue that these are not important. But the detail of what we mean by a term like respect can be difficult to articulate for ourselves and discover in others.

This morning at 4am, I joined a lecture at the University of North Dakota, Space Studies Program. I didn't even have to leave home. The lecture was delivered by Dr Sheryl Bishop who has spent the last 25 years researching human performance and team dynamics in isolated and hostile environments. She has spent time at the poles, deep cave diving, and simulation of space habitats. She also conducted some research in conjunction with Bob Cooper on one of his Advanced Survival Exercises in the Pilbara.

Dr Bishop made an interesting point about how challenging it is to get people to even acknowledge that there is an underlying expectation or assumption at play.

She showed this photo of the crew dining table on the old Skylab Space Station. When it is not in use, the table folds down, leaving just the central pillar. Crew were moving through this room all day, and the Earth based control team noticed that they all pulled themselves around the pillar. It was so much more effort than simply flying over the top. 

When asked, the crew were unable to explain why they did it, especially when there were such obviously easier ways. After a few days of reflection they came back with this explanation. "It just doesn't seem right or polite to fly right over the top of our dining table." The crew had unanimously adopted a practice that took more effort and was based on expectations. They had never discussed it, and even when asked directly about it, took a while to identify why.

Dr Bishop's quote of the day for me was, "Often our expectations and assumptions are completely invisible, even to ourselves."

Had there been a crew member onboard who took the direct, and easier route through the dining room, this would have been a source of possible friction or conflict for the crew. In situations like that people often say things like, "He doesn't respect us." They are not even consciously aware of what the person is specifically doing to create the friction.

As leaders, subtle friction or tension is an early indicator that there are unmet expectations in play. Time spent exploring, and clarifying your expectations and those around you is never wasted. Greater clarity results in better performance, cohesion and dynamics, all of which are better for business.

Systems, Expectations, Promises

Lessons from the Hospitality Industry

She looked away, and seemed to busy herself with other things. With what exactly was hard to tell. We hung in the doorway, wondering what the process was. The breakfast buffet was obvious in front of us, but being our first morning we had no idea whether to make ourselves at home and just get stuck in, or wait to be seated. There were some awkward moments while we hung there whispering to each other about what to do next.

Eventually we made our way to  a table where the experience continued. A notice at the table said we could order eggs ad coffees. The person we had seen earlier seemed to have vanished. We started to make a coffee at the coffee machine, which prompted a staff member to show up and take over. With a bit of a push we got her to take our egg order as well.

These are really small issues AND  they have a significant impact on customer experience. The following day, it was as if we were in a different hotel chain. We were greeted by name by 3 highly visible staff, who asked where we wanted to sit, and took a coffee and egg order as soon as we were comfortable. They took the time to find out what we planned to do for the day, and offered assistance to organise it if we needed it. Gentle music played in the background. 

The fundamentals hadn't changed - there were staff, and food, and furniture - but the second day was easier, much more pleasurable and more in keeping with the promises of a high end 5 star hotel.

Hospitality done well demonstrates many behind the scenes things done well. They have systems to let them know who guests are, and if they are returning, to record some preferences.  Staff put people at ease, and live up to the promises made by the chains reputation or star rating. They also do  great job of checking in with people to see if expectations are met.

So often, the businesses I work with or experience seem to regard it as the customer/client job to navigate their systems. Sometimes it's as if the customer is actually a hinderance. Some businesses have great systems, but use them sporadically, or not at all. Either way it results in an inconsistent experience for the customer. 

In a world where people are time poor, overloaded with information and decisions, businesses can deliver a sense of certainty to their customers, just by being courteous, consistent and committed.

Over the past few months I have been doing some work in partnership with The Bullshift Company. One of the explicit values of the company is "Be easy to deal with". We will work around our own internal issues and glitches to ensure that the customer experiences us as easy to deal with.

What can you do during the next 30 days to raise the level of consistency, certainty and comfort your customers experience? How will you ensure that experience continues beyond the end of the month?

Finding the Right Focus

Each year I like to try at least one thing I have never done before. I find that it helps to keep my mind sharp. I'm exposed to an area of knowledge I haven't been exposed to before, and the new practice forces me out of my well worn, and habitual grooves. From a leadership point of view, it also reminds me what it feels like to be in unfamiliar territory. We often ask others to step up, but if we continually operate within known territory ourselves, we can forget how unsettling a new space can be to the people around us. 

This year, I've been doing some work with Bradley Hunter at The Shed Functional Fitness. Brad is a master of kettle bells, and a seriously good personal trainer. The end of last year for me was hectic, and I found myself adding kilos and stress. I needed a new physical routine.

I've found myself in possession of a couple of shiny new kettle bells. They don't yet have the knocks and scrapes of Brad's set. Aside from the physical benefits, the bells quickly schooled me in being present, paying attention, and finding the right focus. It's worth finding at least one thing in your life that demands being present in the here and now. 

Kettle bells work in part because they force you into dynamic and unstable movements which switch on core and stabilising muscles. If you are not mentally switched on as well, they bite! Safety is a big part of the training, and Brad had briefed me really clearly on how to safely enter and exit each move.

During my first workout at home, I dropped my focus for less than a second. As I rolled over to complete the sequence, I forgot to focus on the bell. It literally took off. A quick but awkward roll managed to get the thing back on the ground without it doing damage to me, or turning into a wrecking ball. All up it was a better outcome than what could have been.

After that initial wakeup call, I find myself instantly present as soon as I touch a kettle bell now. It's almost like meditation!

I like to find activities that demand that kind of presence. It's what I strive to bring to all aspects of my life and work. When I manage that level of presence, I deliver better results, listen more, learn more, and both my business and personal relationships flourish.

Now the heady days of New Years resolutions are well behind us, if you were going to try one new thing this year - something fun, motivating and beneficial - what would that something be? The menu is endless. Will you choose a one off experience like diving with sharks or visiting a new country? Perhaps a course to develop a new skill set? Maybe a dance class? Build a new habit? Join a book club? Or try something new in business like a partnership or new offering? 

What will you do this year that's new and different? What will that new space teach you?